Ahmmmm, what’s there to say about me? I’m a 30-year-old, tank-top-wearing, flip-flop-donning brunette, an outspoken, tattooed, pierced, feisty-ass chickie who FINALLY made her place in this world. Every day brings new situations, circumstances, scenarios, and options. People enter our lives for a reason, whether they stay for the long run or just a few brief moments; they all have something to bring to the table. My friends are an interesting bunch, but they make life fun and a little easier to deal with. I love all you crazy bitches! I have a few obsessions that will never cease: tattoos, music, laughter, guitars, coffee, techno, Tim Burton movies, Edgar Allan Poe, low rise jeans, flippies, black tank tops (any tank tops really), piercings, kissing, G.G. (my chocolate moose), the Muppets, red wine, dancing, ITALIAN GIRLS (y-u-m-m-y), and most of all taking chances. I currently live on the Jersey Shore, but am originally from a po-dunk town in Pennsylvania. I moved here for all the wrong reasons but learned to take the good with the bad. Life is all about choices, options, and chances. I haven’t always made the right decisions but without making them, I wouldn’t be where I am today or gained knowledge from my experiences. Music is a very integral part of my life, and without it some things would seem impossible to deal with. Just a few words or a simple phrase within the lyrics can put many things into perspective. Music fills the void when you hear nothing else. Silence can be a scary proposition, but solitude takes you away from the madness.

“We don’t see things as THEY are; we see things as WE are.” – Anis Nini

I love being surrounded by people and meeting new faces. I have the tendency to smoke too much and mix my alcoholic beverages. I insist that wine, red-headed sluts, upside-down pineapple, and alien secretion shots are a good combination. I’m never drunk but am eternally hungover. I cheat when I play pool and it’s habitual for me to unknowingly take lighters from the bar. I like to drink my friends’ beers and tell them every five seconds that I love them. My road rage is unsurpassed. I don’t use turn signals and I ignore all speed limits. I love to be around people and I am THE social butterfly of all social butterflies. Honesty is required if you want to be a part of my life. I live life to the fullest and, most importantly, I’M FUN! I have an unhealthy attraction to Kevin Spacey and I was engaged to a girl who stole my heart, but, recently, I have recovered it. Oh yes, I’m back in full force, ladies.   My Hollywood husband is Johnny Depp.  My Hollywood wives are as follows:  Sharon Stone, Gina Gershon, Eliza Dushku, Charlize Theron, Meghan Fox, Halle Berry, SARAH MCLACHLAN ::sigh::, and Meryl Streep. I love me some Meryl.  Wanda Sykes is the funniest comedian (besides myself  hahahaha) and her 2009 White House Correspondents’ Dinner joke about Rush Limbaugh left me utterly speechless:

“He’s not saying anything differently than what Osama Bin Laden is saying. You know, you might want to look into this sir, because  I think maybe Rush Limbaugh was the 20th hijacker but he was just so strung out on Oxycontin he missed his flight.”

The Greek word, eros, denotes want, lack …

The desire for that which is missing, the lover wants what it does not have. It is by definition, impossible for her to have what she wants; if, as soon as it is had, it is no longer wanted.

I’m a very sexual and passionate person.  I love kissing and I could do it for hours, days, week, months … you get the idea.  A woman’s body is the most beautiful thing that ever was created and it should be treated as such.  I have a weakness for brunettes, light eyes, hands and amazing mouths.  With the exception of one, every single ex of mine is crazy and I firmly believe they came from the same mother.  Perhaps I should try dating people over the age of 22.  I also have a weakness for accents, green eyes and anyone who favors red wine, dirty martinis and sinful conversation …. grrrr :)   A girl who can play guitar, piano, or violin already has it made. P.S. Uniformed women and bartenders have it made as well :)

If you don’t use proper English, please don’t try to communicate  with me because I will spend most of the time correcting your mistakes and then I will lose interest all together.  I am the ”GRAMMAR NAZI” as some say ;) MELTED BUTTER and RANCH I can not live without. They MUST be put on EVERYTHING.  If you treat me kindness, loyalty and respect, you will get those things in return.  If you treat me like shit, well then most likely you will end up on this site on a page dedicated to people who aren’t worth the space they take up.  Oh yes, the list is already eagerly awaiting to be posted.  I will speak my mind and tell you to your face any problems I may have.  I expect the same in return and If you don’t give me that courtesy, I will call you out. POINT BLANK.   I love my girls and they are my heart. If you disrespect or hurt any of them, hahahaha, good luck. I’m a small bitch, but, I’m full of Irish/Italian blood.  My friends are my 2nd family. We are a tight bunch who love, laugh, cry and party together.  To get to them, you have to get through me :) I try to remain friends with all my ex’s b/c if they weren’t meant to be in my life, I would have never met them. Never burn your bridges.

Last but not least, I’m currently trying to obtain my degree in Criminal Justice with a concentration in forensics.  I work full time during the day at a novelty company and by night, I am a bartender.  Thanks for reading. I look forward to meeting you :) xoxoxo