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Home » Sex and Dating

The Cougar Conundrum

Submitted by Ingrid on March 23, 2010 – 1:20 PM

On the eve of Ginger’s 30th birthday, a 22-year-old mutual acquaintance of ours insinuated that Ginger would now be considered a cougar.

To some, that could actually be considered a compliment. For awhile Ginger actually announced to rooms full of people after her birthday that she was now a cougar, much to my amusement. To others, however, being defined as a “cougar” may not be as thrilling. But what exactly is a cougar, anyway?

[ I had to remove this video because, well, it no longer exists. Pet peeve of mine: copyright suits and forced video removal on YouTube. ]

A cougar, in the most traditional sense, is a woman between the ages of about 35 and 55 that “preys” on younger men, typically those in their twenties.

The term “cougar” can apply to lesbians within that 35- to 55-year-old age range, and Urban Dictionary offers a few others: leopard, lesger, lezger, kitty hawk, and owl, to name a few. Use whichever you which, though cougar remains the most popular of these.

The characteristics of a lesbian cougar are numerous:

They date younger women. That really requires no explanation, does it? And there wasn’t much point to me putting it as a list item, but people like bold text, so … there you go.

They are independent and confident. Cougar women are typically financially and emotionally independent; they tend to be single, childless, have good jobs in a solid career, and can maintain their own existence and livelihood without assistance from anyone else.

They care about themselves. Not only does the cougar have a very positive self-image (which may sometimes be construed as arrogant, though there’s no shame in that!), they spend much time and energy on their appearance. The cougar takes care of her body, dresses in a manner that accentuates her assets, and usually looks very put-together. She feels sexy, and exudes sexiness as a result.

They love sex. Cougars enjoy physical intimacy, and see no shame in advertising that. Sex is a fun activity and they embrace it as such. Let’s face it: you’ll probably get more action from a cougar than any 21-year-old you might pick up, because the cougar is very comfortable with her body, her sexuality, and her love of sex in general.

Are you a cougar, or have you dated/encountered a cougar in the past?

UPDATE! (May 14, 2010) – The New York Post reported yesterday that women who have a partner more than seven years their junior increase their chances of an early death by twenty percent. Curiously, men who do the same tend to live longer. Go figure. Do you think this applies to gays too? Read the article: Sorry, Cougars: Boy Toys Hazardous to Your Health